British withdrawal

 "They sound kind of lame." (Ryan's opinion of the Beatles, March 3, 2011)

I was just working on something and for some reason started singing Yellow Submarine, and he gave me this strange look. I explained to him what I was singing, then pulled up a video of the Beatles singing it on YouTube to provide him with a more authentic experience. That's when he said they sounded lame. When I didn't turn it off, his eye started twitching. 

So I played a bunch of other stuff for him: I Wanna Hold Your Hand, Here Comes The Sun, Ob-La-Di Ob-La-Da, Twist and Shout, Revolution, etc. He started rolling his eyes, and and one point pretended to fall over dead.

RIP Splatman

(Ryan -  2/10/2012)

 

Our, poor snowman, who was standing on his hands, suffered a terrible death. Because his hands were only made from thin sticks, his hands broke, and his head landed facedown on the deck. As his head was made of snow, it was destroyed upon impact. We were proud of you, our faithful snowman. (brief shout out to the Calvin and Hobbes cartoon. This would go great in your snowmen of terror exhibit)

Flabbergast the teacher

Mom: Can someone give me an example of a contraction?

Megan (age 8): Not's. Like not apostrophe s.

Mom: Um...I don't know. Can you think of a sentence in which you would use "not's" correctly.

Megan: Not's a real word. Right? Not IS a real word?

Mom: Yeah. I think that is probably the ONLY sentence in which you would use the word "not's" correctly. (I'm shocked she came up with it so fast. I was trying to figure out how one could use "not is" in a sentence.)

Figuring out the empty threat

(2016) Modern child catches on to useless disciplinary measures:

Digital medicine

 If I ever had any doubts we're living in a tech-saturated age:

Daughter: "Mom, I have a headache. Do you have anything for a headache?"

Me: "A nap."

Daughter: "An app? What app? How does it help my headache?"

Haiku

 Kaitlyn's first haiku (September 28, 2012):

The big tree is brown

The tree can fall any time

So do be careful

Well, sometimes I am spineless…

 "Mommy, are you a snake? 'Cause your skin is coming off."

Kaitlyn (5) - July 2, 2009 - in response to my peeling sunburned skin.