Can you say carbs?

Dad: "What did you have for breakfast?"
Megan: "Poppa-tarts and Texas Road Buns."

Spelling Lesson

Kaitlyn (6): "Ryan, what comes after the "R" in your name?"

Ryan (13): "Y"

Kaitlyn: "Because, I want to learn how to spell your name."

Animal radar?

Kaitlyn was looking at a giraffe and saw the little horns on its head.  She stared at it for a long time and then finally asked dad, "Are those supposed to be Montanas?"  (antenna)

Behold, the inappropriate son!

Those of you with boys, you'll understand.


We sometimes watch a TV show called “Good Eats” on the Food Network channel.  The host, Alton Brown spends each episode talking about how to make a certain dish or cook a certain food.  He also throws in all the interesting tidbits about food, culture, physics, etc.  It’s really very informative and interesting.

Tonight the show was on carrots and during one part, he was explaining why you can’t see when you go from a brightly lit room to a suddenly dim or dark room.  As a visual for this explanation, he walked over to his BBQ grill, which was painted like an eyeball, and said “Behold, the human eye!”  (Following this, he used the grill to help explain the way an eye/iris works).

Well, Ryan got a big kick out of that (he thinks Alton Brown is very funny and spends most of the show laughing).  He said the line “Behold, the human eye” no less than 8 times before the show was over.  I finally had to tell him to stop it!!!  After the show, I sent the boys to get ready for bed.  I could hear them messing around in the bathroom; arguing, fighting, being silly.  Then suddenly Ryan says “I’m telling” and comes tromping up the hall to find me.

“Aaron did a bad thing!”  He tells me.  Then he proceeds to tell me that they are in the bathroom playing around and Ryan decides to do the gag one more time.  So he pulls his eyelids apart really wide and says “Behold, the human eye!”  In response, Aaron promptly pulled down his pants and says, “Behold, the human penis!”

This is one of those times that I’ve utterly defeated myself as a parent.  I promptly burst out laughing, so you know that he will repeat that story anywhere and everywhere he can.  I couldn’t help it though.  It was so unexpected, so “classic boy”, and honestly, so funny!  

My blue, very soft shoes

Everyone is always asking me what kinds of things it is that Aaron does that make me want to pull my hair out. I thought maybe I'd start blogging those things (not to "keep record of wrongs") but because I know some day in the future, I'll want to tell these stories and laugh.

Today, Aaron came in to the living room and said "I'm sorry, I accidently spilled blue stuff in your shoes." ??? Given that he's nearly naked (in his underwear), I'm guessing that he came from the laundry room, but what blue stuff? Last night, I purchased a small bottle of Clorox 2, but it was still in the bag. Following him to the laundry room, I discover that he has managed to dump about 1/2 a gallon of Ultra Downy liquid fabric softener into my blue canvas shoes and all over the floor. Not only are my shoes full, but there's this huge puddle of blue guck on the floor and this overwhelming fabric softener smell coming from the room. According to Aaron, he "didn't know the lid was off" when he managed to do this. I haven't quite figured out whether he knocked the bottle over when climbing on/off the washer or whether he actually dumped the bottle over on purpose.

The ubiquitous "they"

Ryan says to me "You know what they say?" And I asked him, "What who says?"

"The people who make phrases." LOL! It turns out that they say "One person's trash is another person's treasure." And the reason he brought it up was that I had suggested that the best way to clean up his room was to get rid of some non-essentials. I suppose that if they have a good reason for keeping what I consider to be trash, he ought to find a place for it.